A dash of Pepper…

…with a splash of Mint

Had I known

Posted by Pepper on January 2, 2015

Had I been able to peek into the future, here is the letter I would have written to myself in January, 2014.

Dear Pepper,

We have officially entered 2014. Brace yourself. This will be a very big year for you. I know you have absolutely no idea at this time, but in the next 2 months you will actually consider buying a property, one which will be your very first ‘home’. The idea will first be nothing more than a random whim, but it will gather momentum once you actually start looking. I know, did you ever imagine you would be buying a home in Mumbai at the age of 27? Heck, did you even consider this possibility two months ago? Life is full of surprises, isn’t it?

You will first consider buying a smaller apartment, but as your search progresses, you will be drawn into buying a bigger apartment than you had intended to. Your budget will be bungled. You will take on a loan so massive, you wouldn’t have deemed it even possible a while ago. Until now, you have made yourself used to a certain standard of living and some luxuries, some of which you will have to now forgo. In the beginning, you will romanticize the idea of a less expensive lifestyle, as long as you and Mint have each other.

Be warned though, some rough patches lay ahead. Having lesser money than what you are used to is not romantic in the least bit. It will give rise to a lot of arguments and fights between you and Mint. You will struggle to lower your standard of living. I say ‘struggle’ and not ‘will’, because despite all attempts, you will still not be successful in cutting costs. As a result, you will be very stressed. You will second guess your decision of buying a home at this stage of your life a total of 50 times. Seeing your friends leading carefree and reckless lives will make your heavy debt seem even more painful. There will also be times when you and Mint will blame each other for having pushed the other into buying the house. You will be very mad at each other. And then you will also get over it.

This will also be the year in which your personality will undergo some noticeable changes. Buying a house will be a contributing factor. It will make you a wee bit more responsible. Your focus will be to ‘set up’ the house. You will keep coaxing Mint to take on more responsibilities and do more for the house while he will try shunning it all. This will anger you and give rise to more arguments between you and Mint. For atleast half of the year, you will carry with you the weight of tasks left undone. This will make you resentful.

You must understand however, that Mint cannot be blamed if he is unable to cope with the changed you. Remind yourself of the times in which both of you would roll in bed till noon on the weekends. And then proceed to watch movies, while still lying in bed. And only wake up to heat some food and bring it back to bed with you. And then go out in the evenings. Those were the days. The new you always wants to wake up early, spend time cooking a meal, fixing the house, clearing the space and heading out to buy essentials for the new house. You want to fix the lights, buy a bed, hang the curtains, rearrange the living room and more. You go on to grudge Mint when he prefers to lie low instead of doing any kind of work. But if you remember the fact that you are the one who has changed, while he has remained unchanged, you may be a little more gentle with him.

All that said, this will also be the year you will learn to value Mint the most. You will remind yourself a million times of how awesome he is, and how very lucky you are to have him. He will fill your life with so many loving gestures, you will not know how to thank him enough. Like always, you will also be touched by how much he does for your family. And when you get to experience your idea of a ‘blissful’ life, of living close to with your family, you will feel your move back to India from the US has been worth it. Again and again. But yes, you will have to live with Mint’s uncertainty in this regard. He will continue talking about wanting to move back. You will learn to not think beyond a point and live one day at a time instead.

Your health will be more or less okay this year, though you will ignore the deficiencies detected in your blood reports and not focus on fitness at all. I hope you learn soon. This will also be a big year because Oregano will have his kidney transplant surgery and the BFF will get married. Other than that, your social life will get dizzying at times. You will oscillate between whining about it and enjoying it. This will also be the *first* year in your almost five year married life that you will not take any international holiday together. You will have no money but you will still travel to some local destinations. Goa and Kerala will be a lot of fun.

Life has always been full of crazy twists and turns. There’s a lot more in store. Don’t fret. Welcome 2015 with open arms. Sit back and enjoy the ride.



14 Responses to “Had I known”

  1. I don’t know of anyone owning a property in their 20’s. Pat yourselves on the back 🙂

    • Pepper said

      Hehe, thanks! I know a few people actually. But I think more than owning property, it is the fact that we managed to own property in Mumbai that I think we deserve credit for. 🙂

  2. Reblogged this on oshriradhekrishnabole.

  3. This post made me smile…the part about you changing as a person 🙂 are we finally growing up now? buying a house in mumbai IS a very grown-up thing to do! so proud of you, pepper!

    Wish you a very very happy new year ~big big hug~


    • Pepper said

      Wish you a very happy new year too, S! I guess you are right. As surprised as I am by this, I do think I have grown up a little in the past year. Totally agree, buying a house is SUCH a grown up thing to do! I just hope I don’t go back to my messy, irresponsible and uncaring teenage soul..

  4. Happy new year pepper 🙂

    Such a hearty post that exudes an aura of optimism, even about the not-so-nice happenings!
    I love the part where you mention about yourself changing and mint remaining the same. I guess once we align ourselves to that thought process, we ll find it easier to acknowledge and handle our differences (with our partner) 🙂

  5. Happy New Year! The post is so honest and truthful…looking forward to the blogathon!

  6. Firstly congrats! I had no clue !! And mint is a lucky guy to have you. And not just because you try and see things from his perspective

  7. Bikramjit said

    One bad thing about not blogging as much is one misses all that is happening around with other bloggers .. All the best with everything Pepper .. Happy new year to you and family

    Take care and God bless

  8. Deboshree said

    That’s a great way of putting it together!

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