A dash of Pepper…

…with a splash of Mint

Archive for August 4th, 2017

This is YUGE! It changes everything – Part 4

Posted by Pepper on August 4, 2017

The few weeks I had in Mumbai were divine. My parents were spoiling me rotten. I’d get every meal in hand. I still remember looking forward to waking up to a hearty breakfast. Parathas bursting with cheese and paprika,  garlic bread stuffed with grated paneer and spices, idlis with diverse chutneys.

Through out the day, I’d be handed refreshing cups of buttermilk and coconut water that I drank straight out of the shells. I’d get a fresh salad with every meal. My evening snack would be a delicious medley of chopped apples, oranges, walnuts and raisins. I’d also get free shoulder, back and foot massages through out the day. Sigh. Living with my parents was just so easy.

And then it was time for me to return to California. My parents were full of apprehensions, so much so that they wanted to accompany me. I brushed aside all their concerns and assured them I’d be just fine. With some amount of trepidation, I flew back to the Bay Area when I was around 12 weeks.

Pregnancies are hard and I am inclined to believe that twin pregnancies are doubly hard. I joined several online groups of expectant twin moms and was horrified to note how dire the complications were for some of them. I must acknowledge here that I have been very fortunate so far and not experienced any of the scary complications that I read about with twins.

Having said that, let me say this pregnancy has been very hard on my already unfit body. Here is a summary of what I have been going through.

Nausea: I don’t know what hit me as soon as I landed in the Bay Area, but the throwing up was beyond terrible. I was surprised because nausea is supposed to abate once you cross 12-14 weeks and that is right when it picked up for me. It was incredibly intense. I would throw up around 6 to 8 times a day.

Each puke session would have me chug out litres of fluid, leaving me utterly drained out. This would happen every 1 to 2 hours. I waited and waited for it subside but it looked like it would NEVER go. I was so miserable.

To make matters worse, we live in an apartment on the 3rd floor with no elevator. I guess the movement from climbing the stairs would trigger more nausea and despite all my attempts to hold it in till I reached home, I would throw up the moment I started to climb the 3rd and last flight of stairs. This happened every.single.time.

Plastic bags became my new best friends. I couldn’t imagine leaving the house without carrying atleast 10 of them in my handbag. I can’t put in words the amount of insecurity I’d feel if I noticed my stash of bags depleting. It’s like my life depended on those god damn plastic bags. Even going for a small walk in the evening would have me stuff atleast 5 plastic bags in my pocket.

Obviously, we had to find innovative ways to ensure our supply was able to cope with the demands. We couldn’t figure out where to source the plastic bags from. Eventually we started relying on grocery stores. Mint would go and grab the bags used to weigh the veggies and fruits. We were so desperate, it was ridiculous.

The doctors were concerned I was getting too dehydrated. I was also losing weight. We had to consider going to the hospital twice every week to get some fluids through IV. My blood work showed I had low levels of chloride. They said I could possibly be suffering from Hyperemisis Gravidarum. Even writing about all of that gives me the jitters. Weeks turned into months and my days didn’t improve. I was really beginning to think my life was over. I’d never again know what it was like to not throw up.

Complete loss of energy: They say the 2nd trimester is the golden period in a pregnancy. For me, it was probably the worst. It could have been all the puking I did but my energy levels were abysmal. I would be home alone all day and would just lie limp in a corner, forcing myself to make the trip to the loo every time I had to throw up. I’d pant and gasp every time I had to walk 5 steps to get myself a glass of water. Things are still the same on this front. I do move around now but it takes a toll on me. I cannot wait for my body to be infused with normal levels of energy and stamina.

Heart burn: Yet another very common pregnancy symptom, but probably more intense for me. I’d feel a fire burning inside my chest and it was really painful, but I was able to take this pain. What I couldn’t handle was the puking combined with the acidity. I’d actually feel pools of lava sliding up and down my lungs and being hurled out with all the puke. The burning bile would hurt my lungs, my throat and even my nasal passage.

Depression: I had been really unprepared for a lot of things. Just a few months ago I was delighted on finally receiving my work permit. I was looking forward to coming back to the Bay Area and start working. Life obviously had other plans. Instead I found myself hormonal, home alone and pregnant.

The lack of energy made it really hard for me to do a thing. Mint has a long commute and he was already trying his best to manage the house. I’d still drag myself to do simple things like load the dishwasher and then collapse in exhaustion. Many times I would find myself cleaning the bathroom floors cos I hadn’t been able to contain the puke. I remember crying often as I knelt on the floors, wondering where my life was headed? Why was I alone? Why was my family so far away? Why did I have no energy to do simple every day tasks? Will this puking ever stop?

Living on the 3rd floor also meant living under house arrest because with such frightfully low reserves of energy, I couldn’t imagine going up and down the stairs. Being stuck at home made me feel more depressed.

The aches and pains: It started with severe rib pain on the right side. We later found out that Baby B was having a merry time kicking my ribs and being jammed in there. I don’t blame the poor babies, they have such little room. My body isn’t exactly spacious enough for two, though I have widened a lot. The rib pain wouldn’t even let me lean forward for a few seconds to fetch something that was right in front of me.

The back. I have had varying pain, right from lower back to mid back to upper back. I don’t know which part is going to hurt the next moment. Like you can guess, it is intense on most days. But if I had to pick the worst of the lot, I’d pick my knees. I think my knees have just given up. I’m not sure why, because unlike the rest, this doesn’t seem like a common pregnancy symptom. Getting myself up from the couch, climbing up stairs all seem like insurmountable tasks. Please God, let this knee pain be pregnancy related and not a sign of arthritis!

Feet swelling: Yet another common pregnancy symptom, but this one typically occurs in the last few weeks. One of the joys of being pregnant with twins was that I was experiencing everything a lot sooner. My feet constantly resemble, umm, elephant feet. I have a very hard time stuffing them into shoes. Being on my feet for more than 5 minutes hurts like a b*tch. If I have the courage to display my fat, ugly feet, I will put up a picture some day.

Thankfully, the nausea disappeared after months of torture. My faith was reinstated. It was possible to go an entire day without throwing up. I am still living with achy back and knees and swollen feet and intense heart burn. But when I think of how ‘easy’ my pregnancy has been compared to some other twin moms, I can’t help but feel thankful.

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