A dash of Pepper…

…with a splash of Mint

I’m an adult. Yeah right!

Posted by Pepper on September 16, 2010

I have to keep reminding myself, time and again, that I am actually a ‘grown up’ person. An adult. But I think, I live with a teenage soul in my body. My mind refuses to grow up and accept what is reality. I seem to be stuck in a period that has gone by. So where do I belong? I belong to that world where I am stressing over college submissions, staying up all night and meeting a deadline by the skin of my teeth, cursing profs, waiting for vacations, reading novels and love stories with stars in my eyes, binging over chocolate and having coffee running in my veins . Yes, that is my world.

I also have a lot of child like traits. I am delighted when I see ‘aeroplanes’ fly past the skies. My pleasure lies in things like ‘pressing the button’ and watching the garage gate open. (What? It’s fascinating!) I’m playful and jump around when I am excited. I also sulk and throw tantrums when I am mad. I talk a lot of nonsense. I want to be fussed around when I hurt myself even a little. When I am upset, I expect to be held and comforted. Because you see, I am too little and this world is cruel. I expect someone else to set things right for me. Either my parents, or Mint.
So that is where it begins and ends for me. Other things are for the ‘grown ups’. I am not one. I thought being married was a very grown up thing too. I still have an immature, teenage soul right? I thought I would grow up one day, and then get married. But what do I know? I fell in love and decided to live with him. And for that, I needed to get married. And so I did. And its still a blur. A happy blur.
Now I do things that are a part of the ‘grown up’ life too. Like cook dinner or clean the house. But I consider that to be such an accomplishment and actually expect to see an audience applauding me for my feat. The fact that my parents and Mint continue to ‘baby’ me doesn’t help. Oh, I now know who to blame for my absolute refusal to grow up.
I usually ‘act’ all grown up when I have other people around me. I don’t fool around and I am not my lame, giggly self. I might even come across as a smart, poised young girl (Yeah right, again :P) and hold an intellectual conversation with you. But put me in a real adult world where I am surrounded by the typical corporate jargon, forced to become just another power point and excel slave, where discussions revolve around market shares, stock prices and EMIs, I will be all lost.
I do realise I can’t live in my glorious teenaged world forever. Unless I want to be a misfit all my life. So yes, I better grow up. *Repeats to self* – I’m an adult!

6 Responses to “I’m an adult. Yeah right!”

  1. Charan said

    Some people start as a kid, grow up and get back to the kiddo state in the old age and some others cannot accustom themselves to the "become grown up" transition and I guess ur of the latter genre and that is totally fair… and it's something to be proud cos many mature ppl paint a jack a** picture if they try to act like a kid…n I'm sure the better of such a lot… :)Cheers 🙂

  2. Satya said

    I'm totally in sync with what you're saying… i look at each sentence and smile to myself and nod… haha

  3. Pepper said

    Charan: Now you're making me wonder if people think I paint a jack ass picture of myself when I try and 'act' all grown up ;)Satya: I know! We met for the first time when we were 17. That is the exact age at which we stopped growing up. So I suppose you can relate to this 🙂

  4. scorpria said

    So now, its official. You’re my twin! 😀 Or I’m yours….whatever!

  5. ajay said

    I can so relate to stressing over assignment submission, staying up all night and just managing to meet the deadlines. I still fancy aeroplanes and expect my mom to do everything for me. 21 is such a confusing age to be. Sometimes my parents treat me like a school kid and then there are times when they expect me to act like a grown up. I simply don’t know what to do.

  6. Ashwathy said

    Enjoy what you have 🙂 it’s a blessing to be kiddish and carry around that lightweightedness (if there is such a word :P) in your heart

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